Post Grad

I thought upon graduation I would feel immense relief, the ultimate sense of freedom and possibility. Instead I feel the opposite, I feel aimless, stressed, and anxious. Over the past month, I've applied for over thirty jobs. Haven't heard back from anyone. That's not even just for the "Big Girl" jobs, as my roomie calls them, that I've applied for: I've also been looking for jobs in retail and waitressing, in anything. My funds are quickly dwindling and I have more and more bills to pay. On NPR, the host announced he had promising news about the job market. I turned the volume up only to hear that "just" 85,000 jobs were cut in December 2009, down from 600,000 jobs being cut per month in 2008.

Shutting out my problems for a few more days, I took a weekend trip with friends to a lake cabin hidden in a winter wonderland. We borrowed a parent's luxury SUV and spent three days drinking coffee and cheap wine, playing Scrabble, Boggle, and the Beatles Rock Band on Wii, and dancing around to Florence + the Machine, Mumford & Sons, and Vampire Weekend, decked out in scarves and leggings. Basically, it was a weekend of poor college hipsters posing as suburban yuppies.

Unfortunately, our illusion of peace and security was shattered before a viewing of "(500) Days of Summer," during a preview for the film "Post Grad" starring Alexis Bledel. This is supposed to be something like a cute romantic comedy. But to us, the generation for whom it was created, it read more like a réaliste horror film. Ashley even had to leave the room to avoid suffering a panic attack. I squeezed my eyes shut so I wouldn't cry. I assume everything works out for Alexis in the end, but it'll be awhile before I find out, since "Post Grad" is listed as having a "very long wait" on my netflix queue. Maybe I'll have more of my own shit worked out by the time it's my turn to see the movie. Oh to be young, slightly gifted and a recent graduate during an economic crisis.